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Don’t Call Them Easter Eggs, You Intolerant Monsters! They’re Spring Spheres

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Posted on April 12 2011 11:10 am
Follow Lori on Twitter and read more of her work at Snark and Boobs , iOwntheWorld , Right Wing News and Red State.

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From Newsreal’s That’s What She Said blog. Please follow us on Twitter and subscribe to our feed!


A Seattle public school has decided that Easter eggs are super offensive and not politically correct. They’ve renamed them Spring Spheres (even though eggs are not spheres. This is our public education system at work, people):

“At the end of the week I had an idea to fill little plastic eggs with treats and jelly beans and other candy, but I was kind of unsure how the teacher would feel about that,” Jessica said.

She was concerned how the teacher might react to the eggs after of a meeting earlier in the week where she learned about “their abstract behavior rules.”

“I went to the teacher to get her approval and she wanted to ask the administration to see if it was okay,” Jessica explained. “She said that I could do it as long as I called this treat ‘spring spheres.’ I couldn’t call them Easter eggs.”

Rather than question the decision, Jessica opted to “roll with it.” But the third graders had other ideas.

“When I took them out of the bag, the teacher said, ‘Oh look, spring spheres’ and all the kids were like ‘Wow, Easter eggs.’ So they knew,” Jessica said.

Of course they knew. Because they are Easter eggs.

Oh, it’s Seattle, one might say. Of course such things happen there. Hippies! Well, a similar thing occurred in my old hometown in New Jersey. The town Easter egg hunt was changed to “Spring Celebration. With Bunny.”

For reals.

They have since changed it again. One of the dreaded “E” words is no longer forbidden.  No, no… not “Easter.” That would be going too far!

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