There are bad analogies, and then there are bad analogies.
Minnesota Vikings running back Adrian Peterson, also known as “Purple Jesus,” would like you to know that he’s a slave, and The Man is holding him down.
The National Football League Players’ Association, the NFL’s player union, is currently in the midst of a lockout situation with the team owners, as labor talks broke down hours before the latest contract extension was set to expire last week.
Despite the best efforts of a federal government negotiator bussed in to help the millionaire players and the billionaire owners come to an agreement, talks broke down, leading the NFLPA to relinquish its collective-bargaining ,rights and to devolve into a trade association.
Since then, the National Football League has filed a complaint with the National Labor Relations Board, claiming that the NFLPA is using dirty negotiation tactics.
DeMaurice Smith, executive director of the NFL Players Union, is a former Obama administration official, having served on Obama for America’s “Justice and Civil Rights transition team” in the Department of Justice. So obviously, the probability of an Obama administration official playing dirty is absolutely nil, right?
Enter our friend, Purple Jesus.
In an interview with Yahoo! Sports, “All Day” Adrian complained that the owners wanted to run him ragged—no pun intended, as Peterson is a running back for the Minnesota Vikings.
He told interviewer Doug Farrar that “the players are getting robbed. They are. The owners are making so much money off of us to begin with… It’s modern-day slavery, you know?”
“Modern-day slavery?” You mean, like the kind that 12 to 27 million people who are enslaved against their will in South Asia and Africa? Or are we talking about the human trafficking of women and children into the Asian “sex tourism” industry, something that the United Nations describes as the “largest slave trade in history”?
Or, Mr. Purple Jesus, are you simply a spoiled unionista who—while extremely talented, and deserving of the millions of dollars that you’ve made, by virtue of you having abilities that are in demand and are rare among the workforce—is bawling because you want more money?
For what it’s worth, not all footballers are as shallow and self-obsessed as “Purple Jesus.”