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Top 9 Reasons California Sucks

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Posted on February 14 2011 2:40 pm
Diane Schrader, a former television news writer/producer, lives with her family in Los Angeles. She likes a nice cup of tea. Follow her on Twitter.

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7. Tinseltown – just another company town, but their products blow

The L.A. Times says Los Angeles is an industry or company town, and the company is Hollywood. The folks who bring us our entertainment are a somewhat schizophrenic bunch. Every once in a while they produce something that soars, uplifts, provokes reflection, or at least provokes belly laughs. But far, far too often, they use their platform for illegitimate purposes.

The most obvious of these illicit purposes is to degrade our culture and attack traditional morality (especially that of Christians). The recent brouhaha over MTV’s soft-porn teen show “Skins” is just the latest slide down the slope, and rest assured, we are already quite a ways downhill. Consider what is regularly consumed as entertainment in this country, by millions of Americans day in and day out (sigh):

The Girls Next Door – reality show about the girls who are dumb enough to live their lives as the plaything of the original dirty old man. Super yucky. (And recently debunked, right here at Newsreal Blog, as decidedly not glamourous, and dangerous to one’s sexual and mental health.)

Toddlers and Tiaras – reality show about parents dumb enough to spend a lot of money dolling up their daughters like mini-whores, and then travel around the South encouraging them to “shake it” on stage for the purpose of winning a beauty pageant crown worth approximately $15.

Real Housewives of (fill in the blank) – reality show about wealthy, plastic surgicalized, shallow, vain, nasty, self-centered women and how they fight with each other.

Jersey Shore – reality show about… I don’t know what it’s about. I’ve never seen it. It looks horrifying.

And it’s not like the “real” (scripted) shows are much better. You have the venerable Law & Order franchise, so full of itself that you can practically write the script yourself. The illegal aliens are never deported – the cops are too busy solving “real crime,” which is never committed by gays or environmentalists or black people or lefties of any kind, but is always truly the fault of businessmen or religious people (mainly Christians. Muslims need not apply; they are needed to portray victims of hate crimes).

I have never seen an episode of the popular show House in which the wise, God-mocking doctor didn’t uncover someone’s wildly aberrant sexual behavior. The secret reason for the illness is never the super kinky secret that was discovered – that’s just the titillating side story that would lead one to believe that basically everyone in the country is either sleeping with their own daughter, the dog, or dead people.

Comedies. No. The new sitcom Hot in Cleveland is a hot mess of tired sitcom storylines and way too much focus on the sex lives of its female characters, including 90-something Betty White. Yuck. Although if Hugh Hefner would go for her, at least he’d have somebody his own age. Now there’s an idea for a (revolting) show.

Animated series? Another fail. The newest shows, like Bob’s Burgers, make the previously-controversial Simpsons look like an episode of Little House on the Prairie.

In short, our company town, here in the entertainment capital of the world, is busily churning out garbage as our state’s primary export. Now, if at the end of a long day, you want to sit on the couch with a brewski and watch some of this swill… well, it’s a free country (for now). But if you hold to any belief system that involves God, morality, Christianity, traditional values, sexual abstinence outside marriage, personal responsibility, conservative politics, or voting Republican – you will be insulted. Oh, yes, you will.

Next: It’s not enough to pull us into the sewer – Hollywood considers us backward morons, too…

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