Note: For the first two installments of this series, please see Top 10 Things Leftists Like (aka Stuff Leftist People Like #1-10) and Stuff Leftist People Like #11-20 (aka Top 10 Things Leftists Like Continued).
Two years ago, the satirical site Stuff White People Like (SWPL) debuted with the self-description:
“This is a scientific approach to highlight and explain stuff white people like. They are pretty predictable.”
Author Christian Lander released a book last year compiling the first 100 items in his list, and released a follow-up in November titled Whiter Shades of Pale: The Stuff White People Like, Coast to Coast, from Seattle’s Sweaters to Maine’s Microbrews. Copycat sites have sprung up since then, including Stuff Asian People Like, Stuff Black People Like, Stuff Latino People Like, and Stuff Queer People Like.
Though Lander’s write-ups are insightful and entertaining, there’s one problem: too many of the items in his list constitute stuff leftist white people like. For example, Lander offers the entries: Being Offended, Bumper Stickers, Non-Profit Organizations, Picking Their Own Fruit, Political Prisoners, Public Radio, Taking a Year Off, The Sunday New York Times, The World Cup, Threatening to Move to Canada, and Unpaid Internships. This is to say nothing of more obvious entries such as: Barack Obama, Diversity, Free Healthcare, Hating Corporations, Recycling, The Daily Show/Colbert Report, Toyota Prius, Vegan/Vegetarianism, and Whole Foods and Grocery Co-ops.
In the spirit of SWPL, and to extend the tradition for the amusement of those on the Right, I hereby continue “Stuff Leftist People Like”:
#21: Calling Everything Torture
According to the Left, picking up enemy combatants off the battlefield in Afghanistan and keeping them on a tropical island where they get fitness classes, Internet access, H1N1 vaccinations, and mango chutney chicken for dinner is torture.
Splashing water on the faces of high-level terrorists, leaving their lights on at night, and putting a caterpillar in their cells violates the Geneva Convention.
The Left thinks that by repeating, “We are not a nation that condones torture. We have higher standards than that,” they can fool people into thinking acts that aren’t torture are really torture, or that they have higher ethical standards than conservatives.
Recently the Left sunk to a new low by claiming that Pfc. Bradley Manning, alleged to have supplied WikiLeaks founder Julian Assange with the thousands of classified cables released to the public last year, was being “tortured” simply because he was in solitary confinement.
How about this for torture? When President Obama promised to try Khalid Sheikh Mohammed in civilian court in lower Manhattan, he apparently didn’t care that in the same court in which KSM was to be tried, bin Laden aide Mamdouh Salim, while awaiting trial several years ago for his role in the bombing of U.S. embassies in Africa, blinded a prison guard by squirting hot sauce in his face, then plunged a comb sharpened into a dagger deep into the guard’s eye, nearly killing him and causing permanent brain and sight damage.
That, Mr. Obama, is torture.