10. She’s Prettier Than You (and She Couldn’t Care Less)
“Caribou Barbie,” they sneered while insinuating anyone as attractive as Palin couldn’t possibly house a brain behind that stunning face. And she is stunning. Palin is one of those beautiful women for whom doors open, heads turn and lesser beauties fade. She’s one of those girls I imagine had a hard time keeping girlfriends if any were too self-conscious to be lost behind the radiance that is Sarah.
And yet, she is the most unassuming beauty queen I ever saw. How many women on TV can you name who would be caught dead in waders (giant rubber pants with suspenders that make even a taut size 4 look like she weighs 200lbs) and slugging giant halibut with a billy club? And yet, there she is on her show, Sarah Palin’s Alaska, without a stitch of makeup, hair a mess, up to her elbows in fish guts (having a marvelous time) and still managing to look better than most Cover Girls. It must really burn Maureen Dowd that on her best day (with professional makeup artists) she can’t hold a candle to Sarah Palin working a slime line.
This might explain why Dowd has repeatedly said nasty things like Palin is “one nutty puppy,” and has a penchant for “naughty monkey high heels.” I’m willing to bet there’s more than a little jealousy that no one would look twice at her in those same (fabulous) shoes.
Of course, Palin doesn’t care about any of this and would probably not approve of my bringing it up, but I can’t help myself. Much of the hatred from the Left (especially from the women) stems from this type of petty jealousy. And who could blame them? Conservative women in politics tend to be more attractive than leftist politicians. Usually that’s because conservatives do their hair and wear makeup versus the Janeane Garofalo approach which involves not showering and wearing big clunky spectacles last seen on Buddy Holly.
It might also have to do with the optimistic, baby-loving, country-loving, family-centered outlook conservative women embrace. It’s better for your pores to have a spirit of love. It reminds me of a country song (doesn’t everything?) We’re just like you. Only prettier.