3. Eric Holder
My dad used to tease me about my brown eyes. He said they were that color because I was full of… well, you know. So I ask you – what color are Holder’s eyes? Because he is a walking receptacle of that stuff my dad was talking about. This year Holder blamed Congress (read: GOP) of preventing Obama from closing Gitmo, but that was… well, a lie. Nothing was stopping Obama from taking that action. Nothing except the American public’s distaste for this administration’s warm and fuzzy approach to terrorists, which is mainly seen as the legacy of one Eric Holder. Good job on that first trial, Eric! Holder suffers from TDS (truth deficiency syndrome); his particular case is centered around his inability to utter the words “Islam” and “terrorist” in the same sentence (maybe even in the same day).
On other issues, he criticized the Arizona immigration law without reading it – not an outright lie, there, but certainly more bull… stuff. And he dropped the voter fraud case against the Black Panthers, because he apparently actually believes the lie that you can only be guilty of voter fraud if you’re white. Oh, and dropping that case made room in his busy schedule to harass a 58-year-old pro-lifer with some obscure “blocking an entrance to an abortion clinic” law. Now THAT’S a federal case. None of this voter fraud nonsense. So… is it racist to call Eric Holder a jive turkey? (Hint: we will explore this racial angle again with our #1 turkey. Stay tuned.)
Next: the turkey who’s flipping you the bird…