I must be the only person in North America who until moments ago had no idea Rick Sanchez was Cuban-American. Until now I thought his only claim to minority status was membership in a select group of media personalities so stupid that even other media personalities recognize it, but his recent interview on SiriusXM talk show Stand Up! with Pete Dominick completely straightened me out. I now understand he is both Cuban-American and a dolt. (The standard apology to Cuban-Americans and dolts everywhere will be shortly forthcoming.)
But wait, there’s more! In light of remarks Sanchez made in the aforementioned interview, and the sensible reaction of CNN, we can now add to these descriptors “anti-Semitic and unemployed.”
The interview started innocently enough with Sanchez’s explaining the systemic discrimination that had barred him from getting his own show on CNN, celebrity status, book deals and a gazillion dollars in income (oh wait …). Understandably he led with the most egregious episode—an unnamed CNN executive who told Sanchez to his face that he saw him as less of an anchor and more of a reporter like John Quiñones of ABC. I know, I know, it’s Selma all over again. You might want to send the kids out of the room if you choose to play the audio clip at the end of this post.
Warming to his subject, he then moved on to the self-evident bigotry of … Jon Stewart (no, don’t bother wiping your glasses, you really read “Jon Stewart”):
I think to some extent Jon Stewart and [Stephen] Colbert are the same way. I think Jon Stewart’s a bigot.
I think he looks at the world through, his mom, who was a school teacher, and his dad, who was a physicist or something like that. Great, I’m so happy that he grew up in a suburban middle class New Jersey home with everything you could ever imagine.
Well, glad we’re judging Stewart on the content of his character and not some lame stereotype based on class envy. Just in case you are one of the naysayers who doubts that having two professional parents necessarily consigns you to a life of bigotry, Sanchez has a ready explanation:
That’s what happens when you watch yourself on his show every day, and all they ever do is call you stupid.
Got it. Forget about the palatial splendor of New Jersey, a bigot is basically anyone who makes fun of Rick Sanchez, which probably means there is way more bigotry in the land than any of us dared imagine.