10. Why Do Unprogressive Republicans Call Me Meggie Mac?
When this witless, whining, profanity-laden jumble of phrases landed in Meghan’s editor’s inbox, rumor has it that a tear rolled down her cheek and onto her desk. The chapter began:
My name is Meghan McCain. Meghan f***ing McCain. I’m a f***ing celebrity! So why do all these f***ing conservatives keep calling me Meggie Mac?
It’s not like there’s an A in McCain. Well, I mean, not between the M and the first C anyway. If they won’t call me Meghan McCain, then I am TOTES picking my own nickname. My middle name starts with an M so they could call me MMM. Except that wouldn’t be very progressive because mmm sounds like a catcall. NOT progressive at ALL. But if it’s mmm like “Mmm, mmm, mm, Barack Hussein Obama,” that would be totally inclusive and respectful of our dreamy president. Maverick FTW!
This chapter went directly into what Hyperion editors now refer to as the Shredder of Shame.
11. When This Book Becomes A Movie
Meghan’s editors originally hoped to end Dirty Sexy Politics with this chapter, but decided to hold out for something more substantive. Their mistake.
OMG! If this book is in your hands right now it means I am soooo close to selling movie rights! I want Hillary Duff to play me. Like I told the Daily News, “I think she’s really hot – hotter than me – but I’d still want her to play me.”
Plus my bestest friend Tila Tequila HAS to be in it. It’ll be so dirty and sexy, just like this book. LOL!
Wait, wake up! No falling asleep while you read my book! This is totally divisive. H8er!!!!
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