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Fmr. Gen. Sheehan Says Gays in the Military Caused the Srebrenica Massacre and Other Benign But Arguably Objectionable Things Which Caused Completely Unrelated Hoaxes to Retroactively Materialize

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Posted on March 19 2010 5:38 am
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No, he really said that.  Fresh from the Leftist Parallel Universe:

And in other news:

  • The color pink is responsible for ManBearPig.
  • Beets killed Mohammed al Dura in cold blood.
  • People who wear black and brown in the same outfit grow spaghetti in Switzerland.
  • Being stuck behind a school bus when I’m running late bore and raised the Feejee Mermaid.
  • Hippies secretly obtained and then published the Protocols of the Elders of Zion, which were documented by possums.
  • Nellie Furtado’s asinine decision to ruin her face with that brow-lift forced the Alabama legislature to change the value of Pi.
  • Taco Bell decided to purchase the Liberty Bell when Chex Mix started to suck.
  • Hangnails formed the Association of Swiss Mountain Cleaners last year.
  • Björk was inspired to join Led Zeppelin by stepping on a Lego in her bare feet.
  • Women who speak in fake little-girl voices killed the president of Georgia last weekend.
  • Holes in your favorite argyles gave Dmitri Medvedev a nuclear-proof limousine as a birthday present.
  • Debbie Wasserman Schultz‘s voice, in tandem with sissily groomed poodles, created the invisible car.
  • Free-range Turtle Wax was developed whole-cloth from Richard Lugar‘s paralyzed upper lip.
  • Leggings gave us the most ethical and transparent Congress in history.
  • People chewing with their mouths open have driven polar bears to near-extinction.
  • When every radio station conspires to run commercials at the same time a Jackelope sprouts his antlers.
  • Anderson Cooper to lost to Cheech Marin on Jeopardy! because of a faulty buzzer.

Actually, Anderson Cooper really did lose to Cheech.

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