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The American Spectator: Helping Guys Like Me With The Ladies Since 1924

Posted on February 1 2010 1:35 am
Divorced Dad of three. Collection A.V.P. by day, humor/political blogger after the evening dishes. Looking for hot/wealthy/uber-lifted Scottsdale Granny for hi-jinks, hiking, and Saturday-morning coffee. Is this e-harmony?
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Not many guys are as lucky as me: After a 17-year absence from the dating world, who woulda thunk that I would be lucky enough to meet, and then actually date, a very smart, sassy and sexy librarian! I’m still pinching myself…and in between the non-stop grin and the endless worrying over how I’m gonna manage to keep her from finding out what I’m really like, there is an additional matter that might derail this thing before it takes off into the wild blue yonder:

That’s right: Global Warming!

Yeah…it’s a potential flippin’ tragedy around here, boys and girls. She passed all the other tests: Responsible (homeowner, 17-years with her current employer), good mom to her 16-year old daughter, short (5’3″ – at 5’7″ I tower over her like Yao Ming over Spud Webb), curvaceous, health-and-exercise conscious – who could ask for more?

And then Saturday it started.

You see, my petite raven-haired crush was talking about one of her college classes (she went back to school a few years ago and has almost completed her Bachelors at age 44), and after a few minutes it became clear – we are destroying the earth and all the furry little creatures that call it home!

She already knows what I’m like, and that I actually get published at this site now-and-again…but she evidently was trying to break it to me on the down-low…we talk about books and politics and her studies all the time, and I knew she might lean that way due to her love of camping and pesticide-free foods, but when she finally felt comfortable enough to really let loose, well, I was shocked and mortified, to say the least.

I knew this was too good to be true!

After a spirited exchange of ideas (she called me “mean”), she felt compelled to follow-up with an e-mail Sunday morning:

“I’ve really not talked too much about my convictions, but though I’m a Republican, I vote for the man and what he stands for…not the party, which means YES, I have voted for and stood behind Democrats.  I’m totally into environmentalism and believe we are destroying this beautiful planet that God created.  I support animal and environmental groups and take interest in people like Mr. Gore and others involved with green issues.  This is part of who I am.

“I felt afraid to say anything at all to you last night as you seemed so tempered and angered, and I had and still have much homework to do.  I know you are very political and stand strong on many issues.  I do too!  I just wanted you to know….

“Hope you have a nice church service….”

Gulp! Was this to be the end? Not having Swemson’s phone number, I scrambled for an answer.

And then, like a miraculous vision at the foot of Mount Sinai, there it was, right in front of me, winking at me from my computer screen!

Bandow’s latest on AmSpecBlog:

More Fibs on Global Warming

My retort was loaded and ready to be fired!

So fire I did…and then she of course volleyed a pithy rejoinder…and so it went…back and forth…and on and on.

Without going into detail, the exchange created a certain amount of friction, not to mention some healthy intellectual tension.

We decided to meet to iron out our differences, sort of like President Obama and the House Republicans did on Friday…and although the negotiations are not yet complete, we can both truthfully say we have reached a sort of understanding. Why I still have to go hiking on Monday evening is not 100% clear, however.

What ever happened to beers with the boys?

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