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Obama, iPad, Jesus: Who is this King of the News?

Posted on January 29 2010 9:25 am
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The anticipation was palpable…what would he say? What would it do? Is this what we’ve been waiting for?  Experts surmised, pundits pontificated while the population pondered:  whither change?

He spoke…

For some, there was immediate disillusionment.  Others, compelled by loyalty to the “brand,” made excuses for lackluster delivery.  Who could blame them?  When hopes set high are dashed, one needs time to move through stages of grief, denial certainly being one.  Some reacted angrily, others irrationally.  Still others, never persuaded, stolidly awaited their moment of premeditated rebuttal.

Come! Let us reason together: Jesus never said He was coming as literal King at the time.  He can’t be blamed for your confusion, sovereign plan and all.

Just kidding!  I was talking about the iPad.  Look, Steve Jobs never promised flash or better app versatility. He can’t be blamed for the hype-fueled rumors.

Got you again!  You know of whom I speak, his first year, and the culminating crown of his first State of the Union Address.  Listen, people:  Obama never actually articulated what change he would bring and when.  He only promised he’d be a blank screen you could project your own desires upon, while his were projected on dueling plexiglass screens.  He can’t be blamed if what you wanted was the exact opposite of his job description (stop thinking about czars).

He’s just a man, you see.  Now, could you spare a meager $15.00 monthly pittance so he can talk more about things he really can’t do and things he can but pretends he can’t and the things he is doing which no one wanted him to?

He’s not the iPad.

He’s not Jesus.

This isn’t some strange religiopolitech cult amalgamation, either.

Whatever gave you that idea, anyway?

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