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John Edwards Continues His Downward Spiral

Posted on September 24 2009 4:01 pm
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John Edwards, bloodsucking fraud extraordinaire

John Edwards, bloodsucking fraud extraordinaire


Monday night’s Red Eye discussed John Edwards’ continuing, disgraceful treatment of his family.  Andrew Young, a former aide to Edwards, has proposed to write a book making some serious allegations regarding the senator’s extramarital affair with Rielle Hunter (which isn’t her real name), including Edwards’ pledge to someday marry Miss Hunter in a rooftop wedding complete with a performance by the Dave Matthews Band. According to Young, “Edwards promised Hunter that their star-studded wedding would take place just as soon as his cancer-stricken wife, Elizabeth, died.”

Host Greg Gutfeld quipped:

“That’s romance, John Edwards style”

Red Eye then juxtaposed a few creepy pictures with a photo of Edwards.  One of them was of Nosferatu, the vampire from F.W. Murnau’s famous silent German expressionist film based on Bram Stoker’s Dracula.

Red Eye may unknowingly be on to something here; perhaps Edwards actually is a vampire. After all, he spent years preying upon the blood of doctors as a trial lawyer (President of American Association For Justice for two years), before turning his thirst to the spiritual blood of his own wife.

According to Wikipedia:

“In folkloric tales, vampires often visited loved ones and caused mischief or deaths in the neighborhoods they inhabited when they were alive.”

Sure sounds like the Edwards mode of operation. But he’s not an old-fashioned vampire; he’s a modern one (similar to those in HBO’s True Blood) that has a normal life and is a part of society where it’s hard to tell him apart from regular people.  Modern vampires also have a sexual appeal which they exploit to prey upon others.

True Blood creator Alan Ball says,

“Obviously the act of feeding is a very blatant sexual metaphor. There’s penetration. There are bodily fluids exchanged. There’s a cathartic, frenzied physical moment. You know how a lot of people are attracted to the bad boy or the femme fatale? The hot sexy, dangerous person you know is really not good for you?”

We know there is sexual appeal associated with power, political or otherwise; this could easily be likened to the sexuality and allure associated with today’s vampires.  Once again, this sounds like Edwards, whose life work has been to use his power to suck the financial blood of others, and who now has sucked the spiritual blood out of his wife, via an extra-marital affair.

It appears that he’d even be happy to suck your blood, if you’d like him to.  His “John Edwards ’08” website is still taking donations, if anyone is interested…

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